Shared Values: The Key to Successful Relationships

09 Apr

Do likeminded couples stay together better, or does it ring true that opposites attract? The biggest indicator of long-term success is typically neither shared hobbies or balanced personalities, but rather aligned core values.

Cropped shot of a senior couple dancing in the kitchen at home

It’s a question that has spanned the ages. Do likeminded couples stay together better, or does it ring true that opposites attract? Do successful relationships result from dynamics, which complement or supplement each other? As a matchmaker with Maclynn International, I can tell you that the biggest indicator of long-term success is typically neither shared hobbies or balanced personalities, but rather aligned core values.

We’ve all heard the stories. Someone close to us has been in a committed relationship for a long time. They had great initial chemistry, maybe even got married or had children. But after many years, you’ve watched the integrity of their relationship deteriorate. Often, many of these deep-rooted issues can be attributed to a difference in core values that went previously unnoticed. The test of time will often reveal these incompatibilities, but only after quite a bit of heartache.

Maclynn International pre-empts these incompatibilities by incorporating psychological principles and core values into our matchmaking process. Every client who joins us, completes an assessment that we have thoughtfully created using our knowledge as psychologists and relationship experts. The assessment acts as a tool to help our clients determine which values are most important to them. While it sounds like a simple homework assignment, many of them struggle to identify what values they hold most dearly.

While it can be difficult to prioritize your values, it’s crucial to consider. When push comes to shove, are you more likely to stay close to family? Or do you prioritize individualism and adventure? How important is something like ‘’ambition’’ to you in a partner, and what does that look like to you? How do you know when someone holds the same values that you do? These are often not easy questions to answer – hence why Maclynn International matchmakers spend 90 minutes discussing these topics with each of their clients before beginning the search. We address several key areas of life to gain an understanding of each of our member’s life philosophies – from the basic questions of ‘’do you want kids?’’ or ‘’what religion do you practice?’’ all the way down to minutia of ‘’what gives you passion in life?’’ or even ‘’who did you vote for?’’

When you compare this to the tactics used by dating apps, which often rely on initial attraction and chemistry to find ‘’success,’’ it’s not surprising that the two methods may differ in effectiveness. Here at Maclynn International, we have refined our method over time to best assist our clients find long term happiness in their relationships. If you’re single and looking for someone who truly shares your outlook on life, contact us today.

by Rachel Vida Maclynn

Founder & CEO

Rachel Vida Maclynn is reputed as being a world-leading matchmaking and dating expert. Registered as a Chartered Psychologist with the British Psychological Society, Rachel advocates a professional matchmaking approach based on psychological principles and professional consultation.More by this author

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