Trusting the Process: Matchmaking Explained

18 January 2023 | 4 mins

Most people are at least somewhat familiar with the concept of the matchmaker, whether from novels, TV, or the movies. You may even know someone who’s used a matchmaking service—it’s a lot more common than you might think. After all, just as busy professionals often outsource other aspects of their lives to the pros, like cleaning, daycare, and laundry, so many also choose to get an expert involved to find them their perfect match. It saves a huge amount of time, negates most of the “games” so rife in modern dating, and massively increases your odds of finding someone unbelievably compatible.

A matchmaker is a confidante, a coach, a motivator. They put a strategy in place for your love life, and provide easy and manageable steps to actualize your dating goals, one day at a time. But for the interested yet uninitiated among you, let’s take a step back and lay out the process from the start.

How does matchmaking actually work?

The first thing your matchmaker will do is get to understand the nuances of your values, your personality, and your relationship history. They’ll find out about your prior relationships and dating experiences, as well as what’s worked for you in the past—and what hasn’t. Then they’ll compile a personality profile for you, which is the crucial tool in the subsequent matchmaking process.

Next, you and your matchmaker will work out what your relationship goals are, then set some manageable milestones to get the ball rolling. You can expect a degree of frankness and honesty that you might not be accustomed to from friends and family. That’s because your matchmaker can take a far more objective view of your love life, and guide you according to what you actually need and want, as opposed to what you think you need.

Your matchmaker will set you up on dates with handpicked singles who they’ve determined to closely match your criteria. After each date, you’ll evaluate how it went, get feedback and advice, and discuss how best to move forward, whether with that same person for date #2 or with a new prospective partner.

Finally, depending on the package you’ve opted for, your matchmaker may also be able to coach you on what to wear on your dates, how to manage your insecurities and anxieties, and how to build up your confidence. If not, they may well have a network of specialist advisors on hand to help you out in those departments.

What makes an amazing matchmaker?

A top matchmaker has a refined combination of exceptional interpersonal skills and a superlative intuition about who would have chemistry with whom. Moreover, because our matchmakers have delivered time and again—in the form of hundreds or even thousands of happy couples – we have large networks of singles. That means better odds of you finding someone truly special among their number.

A good matchmaker is dedicated to seeing you succeed, no matter what form your dating goals take. They have incredible instincts, and their eyes and ears are forever open to potential partners for you. I can probably speak for most matchmakers when I say that I’m never truly “off duty”—whether I’m at a work event, a party, or a wedding, I can clock a potential match for a client even across the room!

Is matchmaking confidential?

The very nature of the process means you have to open yourself up to your matchmaker, trusting in them to see your flaws and vulnerabilities and not judge you, but rather see you as the best possible version of yourself, then work to finding someone who will make you happy, and who you will make happy as well.

Matchmakers are sociable creatures—we’re “people people” pretty much by definition—but be under no illusion: Discretion and confidentiality are of the utmost importance to us at all times. Because without them, the process would be null and void. This is precisely why the rich and famous often enlist the help of our matchmakers: They can find love just as everyone else wants to, away from prying eyes, unfounded rumors, and salacious gossip. But it’s not just celebrities who see the value in matchmaking—on the contrary, the majority of our clients are simply busy professionals who want to go under the radar while finding someone amazing to settle down with. They don’t necessarily want people at work, in their social circles, or even in their own family to know they’re actively looking to date. That’s their prerogative. And as matchmakers, it’s our privilege to uphold the discretion our clients want and deserve.

Maclynn is a boutique, multi-award-winning introductions agency with offices in New York, New Jersey, California, and London. We’re world-renowned for bringing together highly compatible singles within our vast network of attractive, intelligent professionals, and our matchmakers are relationship experts in their own right. Get in touch today, and prepare for genuinely meaningful dating.

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About the Author

Gina Yannotta

Gina Yannotta is Head Matchmaker & Chief Operating Officer at Maclynn International's New York office. Gina’s unyielding passion for the field, in combination with her extensive experience in matchmaking, has allowed her to orchestrate successful and everlasting relationships amongst her clients. Tasked with running the Manhattan office, Gina utilizes her interpersonal skills and relationship expertise to make a splash in the matchmaking pool, personally connecting her clients with their ultimate match while simultaneously taking advantage of the endless possibilities that NYC offers to its client-base.

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