Most people – both men and women – often have very strict age brackets that they’re willing to date and sometimes are very reluctant to date anyone older than themselves. But is it possible your age boundaries are holding you back? When it comes to falling in love, having the mindset of only dating someone in a particular age range may be hindering and massively limiting your chances of finding someone truly compatible. You never know, your life partner might be just a couple of years older than you think…
Is age just a number?
We can’t help who we fall in love with. Sometimes we can share an unexpected, yet deep and meaningful connection with someone several years older or younger than ourselves. Although the age gap may have you and the rest of society questioning compatibility, experts have seen that couples with large age differences can go on to have very positive and successful long-term relationships.
When you think of couples with large age gaps, generally the couple that comes to mind is an older, wealthy gentleman with a younger very attractive lady. Society sees their relationship as a trade-off between wealth and beauty, and there’s the idea that without these two factors (wealth and beauty) this couple would not be together. But, when you really think about it, aren’t all relationships transactional?
In all relationships, something is always being exchanged from one person to the other, whatever you provide for your partner and what they can provide for you. This is usually in terms of security, affection, comfort, stability, emotional support, etc. Within this transactional relationship, age is essentially irrelevant.
Additionally, love isn’t inhibited by age. Deep bonds and connections can form regardless of the age difference between the two individuals, but many people still have strict age boundaries when it comes to the people they’re willing to date. Unfortunately, they may be missing out on someone they could have a long-lasting relationship with because they are concerned with the difference of a few years.
Rethinking age in dating
Of course, dating someone your parent’s age isn’t something we’d necessarily advocate. We suggest considering people in the same generation or 12.5 years older or younger than yourself, as it increases the likelihood that you’re going to hold similar values and have similar backgrounds as well as visions for the future. If you choose to go outside a generation, these aspects may be less likely to align. With this in mind, it may be worth reconsidering if you’re thinking about rejecting someone just on age, what’s the worst that could happen if you give it a try?
Anyway, why is age so important? Is it going to impact the fundamental aspects of a relationship? If someone can provide you with stability, security, passion, and happiness and is someone that you share a deep connection with, then is it worth potentially losing this simply because they’re a few years older than you’d like?
If you’re still not convinced. I invite you to ask yourself why age is so important to you. Is it that you’ve never been interested in anyone that is outside of your normal age preferences or are you letting their age get in the way of finding out if you even have a connection? If you met your dream partner on a night out and then found out afterward that they were a few years older than you would prefer, would you simply be uninterested? I doubt it. This suggests we often are limiting ourselves when it comes to age, as the key aspects of a relationship can be present even with an age gap.
I encourage you to try being more open-minded and not miss out on the opportunity to date someone you’re compatible with in all other aspects just based on your age differences.
If you’re getting tired of your current dating situation and would like some help optimizing your online dating profile or discussing relationship issues with your current partner, our date coaching services can help! You don’t have to be one of our clients, all are welcome to book sessions. Contact us today!