As matchmakers, we sometimes initiate matches that might not seem outwardly compatible, but that flourish nonetheless. With insight into the psychology of our clients, and sometimes a little coaching, we’re able to spot and nurture connections where they might otherwise be missed. This was the story of a recent client of mine, William.
Client Backgrounds
William is a professional living in New York, who has found great success in the venture capital sphere. Incredibly intelligent, clever, and witty, he could nonetheless seem a shade taciturn in some cases.
His match, on the other hand—Barney—is outwardly vibrant, charismatic, and warm. At first glance, their personalities might not have suggested the success they found after being matched.
William’s Dating Challenges and Obstacles
Everyone’s dating journey is personal, and every challenge unique to them. For William, he had noticed that there were often lifestyle differences between himself and his potential matches.
He was seeking a partner with a certain stability in their lives and someone who was genuine and serious about a long-term relationship. A sense of respect was essential, along with someone who valued both their time and his own.
On the contrary, William was meeting matches who were using him to get ahead in their careers. This agenda had surfaced before in potential partners, leading him to seek a relationship which was balanced—not one-sided—where both partners were individually engaged in their careers.
Barney’s Challenges and Obstacles
A member of our Open Member network, Barney had shared with us that previous matches he met tended not to be as emotionally available and vulnerable as he would like. He was someone who gave their all and preferred partners who expressed their feelings openly through words, actions, and physical touch.
Relationship Goals
Although personality-wise William and Barney may have seemed opposed, they shared common relationship goals that showed the potential for long-term compatibility. Both were seeking a sense of stability from their next partner, which they were having trouble finding.
For William, it was important to feel that he and his future partner valued each other’s time, and the time they would spend together. For Barney, a partner who was self-aware was key, as well as an open, honest, and passionate relationship.
In terms of long-term relationship goals, both wanted to get married and have children.
The Matchmaking Process
Our five-step matchmaking process places a particular emphasis on values. This helped when pairing William and Barney; their temperaments, interests, lifestyles, and values aligned—and these were strong foundations to build on.
Beginning with our Compatibility Profiling session, I was able to get to know both William and Bradley on a deeper level. Having developed a rapport with Barney as an Open Member already, I determined that he would be a suitable match for William.
For me, lifestyle is a primary matching criterion—whether these two lives align at a foundational level. Traits, values, and characteristics all play an important role too, and ensuring that their future life and relationship goals are matched.
Meeting Their Match: The First Date
After being introduced through Maclynn, William and Barney decided to meet. On their first date, they met for dinner and a walk, connecting immediately. To William, Barney seemed a gentleman, and smart. To Barney, William seemed to be interesting, intelligent, thoughtful, and kind.
They met for a second date the next day, and organised a third too, finding common ground over a shared love of theatre and Broadway. With every date their connection grew, leading them to decide to build a relationship together.
The Positive Signs
As a matchmaker, it’s our role to spot when a connection has the potential to grow further. We are on hand throughout the dating process to support our client and their match.
For William and Barney, it was clear that they had chemistry and compatibility when they almost immediately decided to see each other again after the first date. All too often, first impressions become so selective that the match can’t even make it past the first meeting.
When we receive positive feedback, that highlights their match’s strengths and their areas of alignment. Similarly, when both partners can recognise obstacles and genuinely want to work through them, it’s a sign of something great to come.
Overcoming Challenges and Obstacles
Relationships without challenges are rare but it’s always a positive sign when the couple is willing to work through obstacles. For William and Barney, their main challenge was distance, with William living primarily in NYC and Barney in London.
With time, this became less of a challenge, as they each realised they spent enough time in both locations to make it work. Importantly, they had the desire to see it through.
The Present Day: Where Are They Now?
William and Barney have now been dating for over a year and they seem very happy! As they connected, William became more in tune with his emotions than I’d seen him before. His warmth exuded through the bond they formed. Although they were both offered coaching, their relationship thrived without a need for this.
One of the best aspects of our job as matchmakers is the photos and beautiful stories we receive from our matches; and William and Barney have been in touch throughout the year to share pictures of them together, along with their gratefulness and happiness.
Matchmaker Learnings
As matchmakers we learn plenty from our clients, just as they learn from us. As William’s matchmaker, his experience cemented the sentiment that even though two individuals can seem wildly different on the exterior, this doesn’t mean they can’t be incredibly compatible. It is my job as his matchmaker to establish their compatibility.
For me, William and Barney also show that no matter the distance, if there is a connection, couples will work it out. With consistent honesty and openness, William and Barney were able to communicate about their preferences and desires for the long term.
William’s Success Story: My Takeaways
Love can take so many forms. It is not a neat package that is perfectly wrapped, but a beautiful kaleidoscope that is ever-changing and becomes both more complex and simple with time. Love takes time and patience. It takes honesty, trust, and dedication. However, true love is something that never dies once it’s born.
At Maclynn, we have the privilege of seeing our clients go through many stages of their dating journey and, using our 5-stage methodology, we can tailor the approach on an individual basis. As we work with these individuals, we form a bond with them as well, and through this trust, we hope to lead them towards love with a future partner.
Client Testimonial
“Just wanted to drop you a short note to say thank you. William and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary last month—I am so grateful for the moment you introduced us but very aware of the work you put into making that match happen.
I attach this photo—a moment of calm—amidst a whirlwind of a year—making sure we spend as much time together as possible.
Thank you for making love possible and for giving us this opportunity to find each other.
Yours,
Barney & William”
Seeking Your Own Success Story?
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To begin your own success story with our US matchmakers, enquire today. We’ll be in touch to start the process and understand if our team can help you in your search for love.